Overwhelmed? 7 Ways to Take Back Control

Overwhelmed? 7 Ways to Take Back Control

Kelly Kennedy: Welcome to episode 247 of the Business Development Podcast, and this week I hit my limit and maybe you have to, if you've ever looked at your calendar, your inbox, your endless to-do lists and thought, there's no way I can do it all, this episode is for you today. I wanna remind you that it's not just okay to push things to next week.

Sometimes it's the smartest thing you can do. We're gonna break down why we get overwhelmed, how to protect ourselves from it, and how to build simple habits that help you stay steady no matter how chaotic life gets. Take a breath. Stick with us. You're not gonna want to miss this episode.

Intro: The Great Mark Cuban once said, business happens over years and years.

Value is measured in the total upside of a business relationship, not by how much you squeezed out in any one deal. And we couldn't agree more. This is the Business Development podcast based in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. In broadcasting to the world, you'll get expert business development advice, tips, and experiences, and you'll hear interviews with business owners, CEOs.

And business development reps. You'll get actionable advice on how to grow business, brought to you by Capital Business Development CapitalBD.ca, let's do it.

Welcome to The Business Development Podcast, and now your expert host. Kelly Kennedy.

Kelly Kennedy: Hello. Welcome to episode 247 of the Business Development Podcast.

Let me start today's show by saying if it's your first time tuning in, or if you've been with us for a very long time. I appreciate you greatly. The Business Development Podcast has been such an incredible journey, guys I could have never imagined what this journey was going to mean for my life. It's been exciting.

It's been hard. It's pushed my boundaries in basically every way possible, and it's forced me to grow over and over again. And guys, I could not be more grateful for that opportunity. Most of all, though it has connected me with all of you, my rock stars, my incredible experts, and my incredible community.

Thank you so much for sticking with me. Telling your friends, family, and colleagues, you have made this journey possible. And from the bottom of my heart, I wanna say thank you guys. When I started this show, I told you all that I would be real with you. I would share the good, the bad, and sometimes the ugly.

I promised to educate and inspire and not shy away from the hard stuff. And today. I want to talk about the hard stuff because if you are listening to this, you are likely a high performer. And if you are a high performer, life is rarely a walk in the park. And I can say this from experience guys. I basically push my boundaries in every way possible.

I try to do the best I can with everything I do, and too often I bite off more than I can shoot. This week is no exception. I like to say sometimes, guys, that this show produces itself and while I have an episode lineup that I like to go through and notes on what shows I want to do, every once in a while a show like this comes up, a week like this comes up where the past little bit has just been overwhelm after overwhelm, and I'm like, dammit, I think we have to do a show about it.

So who knows? Maybe it's the universe. Maybe it's synchronicity. But I think every once in a while the show idea really just says you have to do it. And today we're gonna talk all about overwhelm. Let me start out by saying like you, my journey is far from easy so far this week, and it's only Tuesday I've tackled client work, lunch meetings, authentic hustle, monthly meeting.

Coaching sponsorship reach outs, show planning reports, and review asks and once again, it's only Tuesday. The remainder of this week, I have three shows to produce, coaching, client work, community building work, and two more BDP interviews. Oh, and I still have to be a great partner, dad, friend, and get my social media for the week tackled.

Now, I know this sounds like a bitch session, and maybe it is a little bit, but this is also the hard that I choose. This is not every week. Some weeks are easier and some are harder, but the point is sometimes we all bite off more than we can chew. Sometimes, no matter how hard you push, there's just too much on your plate.

And guys, I just wanna chat as like a high performer, as a perfectionist, a little, and you guys know I've talked about this many times. I struggle with taking on too much because I'm always trying to be better. I'm always trying to be able to move to the next rung on the ladder. One thing that I've realized is that it's action in the right direction that moves the needle, right?

It's little actions that make a difference over time, but what ends up happening is it's little action after little action, and next thing you know you're taking on everything. And that is where disaster strikes Today. I want to remind you and myself. It's okay to not get it all done.

Overwhelm is real and sometimes the best move is to take a breath. Do what you can, do as well as you can, and push the rest to next week. Today's episode is your permission. To slow down, reset, and come back stronger. Let's talk about how to manage the pressure. Keep your sanity intact when the list just won't stop growing.

But first off, how the hell did we get here in the first place? We live in a world that glorifies more tasks, more goals, more achievements. Somewhere along the way, we started measuring our worth by how much we can juggle at one time. We set huge goals, pack our calendars, and say yes to every opportunity we tell ourselves.

We'll figure it out. But what happens when we hit weeks just like this one? The truth is overwhelm often sneaks in because we forget to build breathing room. We underestimate how much energy it takes to do things well, and we rarely pause to ask if all of this is truly necessary right now. So today, let's unpack how we got here and some of the things that we can do to break the cycle.

I wanted to pause here guys and just talk to you a little bit about myself and my own life. I struggle with overwhelm quite a bit. If you haven't noticed. I try to structure a lot of things into my life in order to bring peace and calm and what I. What I find happens to me over and over again is that if I don't do this, if I don't plan out my life, schedule it into calendars, do my weekly move the needle list, I inevitably take on too much or miss stuff because I can get caught in that I have to do something hamster wheel and when I have to do something and I don't have it laid out as to what is important, I do everything.

And I know I'm not alone in this. I know that there's many of you listening right now who are like, Kelly, I totally get that. So for me, I've found that I have to incorporate structure into my life. I have to plan things out, I have to put things in my calendar. And guys, even when I do this, lemme just start out by saying I'm by no means perfect at this.

I'm clearly in a state of overwhelm today, to be honest. Like I've bitten off more than I can chew this week. I'm still trying to figure out how the heck I can do it all. And the truth is I probably can't. The truth is. For the list of things that I have for this week, I'm probably gonna have to kick some into next week, and I have to get better at just saying no and saying no to myself.

First off, this isn't me saying no to clients. This is me saying no to myself because I am my biggest critic. I'm the one constantly saying, come on, Kelly, one more thing. You got this. Just add another thing to the list. Move the needle a little more, get a little closer to success or whatever I'm going towards.

It's me, and it's funny because there's plenty of times where I'll be talking about my week with Shelby and she'll be like, Kelly, you control your calendar. She's absolutely right. That's the funny thing. We all control our calendars, and so at the end of the day, it's not about taking on too much or about other people overloading us.

Nine times out of 10, it's about us overloading ourselves, and we are going to get into that. Right now, there are 10 core factors that contribute to feeling over your head. Number one. Saying yes. Too often my hand, way up guys. I hate saying no. We all agree to too many things, projects, meetings, favors without protecting our own time or asking if they even align with what really matters to us.

How much of the stuff that you do every single week. Moves the needle for you or is just busy work is really doing nothing or could be kicked down the line as a non-priority. Number two, underestimating how long things take. I say it all the time, guys, it always takes longer. It doesn't matter how long we project or what timelines we put on something, it always takes longer.

Getting new clients takes longer. Doing our marketing takes longer. Making our calls always takes a little longer, right? Everything takes longer. We underestimate how long things take. We plan for ideal conditions and forget that life happens and tasks spill over and days run out of hours. I don't care who you are.

You have limited time in the day, and so you can't just take on endless tasks. Eventually you're gonna burn out or you're just not going to get it done altogether. We have to prioritize the tasks that matter, do those first and understand, and not everything is a priority. Number three, perfectionism and unrealistic standards.

We hold ourselves to impossible expectations, wanting everything flawless when good enough would move us forward faster. My gosh, how many projects never end? Never end because we're waiting for them to be perfect. How many things in your life, your websites, your marketing materials, your LinkedIn profiles, your pitch, your follow-up call on the proposal you sent?

How many of those things don't get done because we're holding ourselves to impossible expectations. Many of us never start because we're afraid we can't do it perfectly. Listen, I. There is such thing as good enough and good enough moves mountains. Number four, not protecting our downtime. We treat rest like a luxury instead of a necessity.

We skip breaks late nights, working weekends. Leaving, many of us running on fumes, guys, two hands, two hands way up. I find myself regularly working on the weekend, regularly, working late into the night, and yes, I love my work and yes, I love what I do, but it absolutely does pile up over time. And so at some point you have to prioritize yourselves.

You have to prioritize your weekends, your sleep time with the family. You have to do it because you can't run on fumes forever. You will burn out. Number five, we avoid the hard conversations. We don't say no, we don't renegotiate, and we don't push back when we need to. So we carry loads that should be shared or spread out.

Okay. This happens to all of us, okay? Many of us. Many of us, I would say probably 90% of us hate saying no. I really believe that we have to get better at saying no. And remember no doesn't mean no forever. It means no in this moment. Give me some time. Let me get caught up. Let me get reset. Let me deal with the priorities I need to handle today.

And you can say yes down the line. Don't be afraid to say no, and I struggle with this. I'm gonna work on it. Please work on it with me. Number six, unexpected curve balls. Life always throws surprises. I struggle with this guys 'cause I don't have room for surprises in my life and yet I'm a father. I get sick and inevitably these surprises come up.

Sickness emergencies, unexpected client needs without buffer time. These derail everything. I can't tell you how many times just small things happen and suddenly it's oh shit, I didn't plan for that small thing, and now it's thrown out my whole schedule and I'm working late to figure it out, or I'm trying to steal time from my mornings.

Unexpected curve balls happen. Life will throw surprises. We have to make room for these and expect them they are coming whether we like it or not. Number seven, lack of systems planning where there is no clear plan or routine. Small tasks get lost and big ones get rushed, and the whole week feels reactive instead of focused.

Systems are everything. We talk about process on the BD, P all the time. What is it that creates success? Consistent process over time makes success, repeated actions over time. Small things repeated on a consistent basis. Move mountains. It's the lack of systems, it's the lack of a plan. It's the lack of schedule that has you responding instead of executing.

Number eight, comparing to others, we see other people's highlight reels and think we should do more. So we add goals or push harder without checking if that fits our life. How often are we chasing somebody else's dream? Are we chasing a dream of success that we don't even know if that's what we want? I know I struggle with that and.

I'm not sure that any of us have the exact answer of the perfect life. We see other people's lives, and we think that would be pretty awesome. But once again, it asks a very fitting question, does that fit us? I don't know. I can't answer that for you. Number nine, not asking for help. Trying to do everything yourself keeps us stuck.

Delegating or leaning on support would lighten the load, but pride or guilt holds us back. We hate asking for help. High performers hate asking for help. We feel like it's. Relinquishing our control, or it's us giving up or saying we weren't good enough. One of the big surprises that I've found in the Business Development podcast and in my business journey is that nothing happens without the support of a community.

I can't do this show if you guys don't listen. I can't be a good coach if I don't have people lifting me up and helping me be a good coach. I can't do anything by myself. Nothing in business happens in a vacuum. And once you realize that asking for help doesn't feel so hard. And number 10, poor boundaries with tech, constant pings, endless notifications, and doom scrolling, eats our time, scatters our focus, making it harder to get real work done.

So if you're nodding along thinking, yes, that's me all 10, maybe even more. The good news is we don't have to stay stuck here. There is hope at the end of this high performer tunnel. Okay? Overwhelm isn't just about too much work. It's usually about not enough clarity, not enough structure, and not enough margins built into your schedules.

When you build simple habits and guardrails, you don't eliminate hard weeks completely, but you do create stability and breathing room to handle them without burning out. Here are a few practices that have saved my sanity, and I hope that they will help you too. I. Number one weekly. Move the needle list guys.

Every Monday, write down five to 10 things that will truly move your goals forward this week. Okay, not busy work, impact work. And do these first before the noise inside the Catalyst Club guys, every Monday. Now I am posting my move the needle list. On Monday and it's pretty cool because other members are stepping up and in the comments they are posting their move the needle list.

And this simple task, as silly as it is, I get that it like might sound woowoo to you guys, but science has proven that if you are willing to write down your goals for the week, you are 42% more likely to achieve them. This is a scientific fact. Okay? And so here's the thing, whether you believe it's woo or not.

42%. Can you really afford not to try? I don't think so. The other thing with the move the needle list guys, is that it brings clarity. It brings clarity. Remember we talked about earlier on how you can get just like overwhelmed, you don't know what's going on if I don't do my move the needle list. I start to feel crazy because I know I have a ton of things to do, and if I don't have them listed out in an easy to understand way, in a way that I can just check them off as I go, or I can check back on them multiple times a week to know where I'm at or what I need to do, I won't get it done.

The simple act of me writing it down for me brings clarity, and clarity, allows me to follow my process and get it done more effectively. Trust me on this, guys. Move the needle lists will change your life. Trust me on it. Let me know. Reach out to me. Let me know after a month of doing, move the needle lists if they work for you or not.

But my guess is I'm gonna get a lot of really great messages. Number two, plan with realistic buffers. Okay? Estimate how long tasks really take and then add like 30% more time. Leave white space in your calendar for life's surprises over planning, guarantees, frustration, margins give you space if you're back to back calendar.

And guys, I'm a huge fan of the calendar. Let me just start off by saying. Almost everything I do is scheduled, but I actually do implement this and I do leave white space, let's call it a half an hour buffer between important tasks to just give me a little bit of a mental reset. And if things go a little longer, I have that time.

Or if I need a little bit of extra time, I have that time. Make sure that you are not allowing your calendar to just get blocked up completely. Give yourself buffer spaces, whether it's interviews, whether it's client meetings. Whatever you need, give yourself a little bit extra time. To make sure that you have it if you need that breathing room.

Number three, practice saying, not right now. You don't have to say no forever. Okay? This isn't no forever, and I talked about this earlier. You don't have to say no forever. Sometimes it's just not this week. Renegotiate deadlines, defer ideas, or tell people when you realistically have capacity. Okay? Don't be afraid to say no.

No is probably the most powerful word in your entire vocabulary. And if you haven't practiced it, now is the time I'm gonna work on my no, you work on yours and we could talk about it later. Number four, protect uninterrupted work blocks. Turn off notifications, close your email and focus on one thing at a time.

60 minutes of focused work blows away. Four hours of scattered. Multitasking. Okay. Seriously, 60 minutes of focused work is probably more powerful than most people's eight hour day. That's the world we live in. Okay? You wanna get more effective, you wanna put out more than you ever have before? Do multiple.

Hours of focused work. Focused work will change your life. It was focused work that allowed me to realize how much time I was wasting, and once I did, I couldn't unsee it and I got a thousand times more efficient than I've ever been in my life. Number five, build in real rest. Guard your evenings, your weekends, and sleep.

When you rest well, you work smarter. Faster and harder than you ever have before. Burnout costs more time than taking a break ever. Will. Remember that burnout will cost you more than any break ever will. Number six, ask for help or delegate, whether it's at home or at work. Stop wearing the hero cape. Let people support you.

You will be amazed by how much lighter the load feels and how willing people are to help you. I think most of us feel bad asking for help, but the funny thing is most people want to be asked for help. That's the funny thing, being asked for help. Shows you care and you value somebody seriously. People want to be asked for help.

Don't be afraid to ask. You will be surprised. I am every time. Number seven, check in weekly and adjust monthly. Review what worked, what didn't, and what keeps creeping back onto your plate. Tweak your plan and stop repeating old patterns. Okay? You can't change something unless you deliberately make a choice to change it.

Okay? If you just say, okay, no worries, and you keep doing the same thing over and over again. Your brain loves repetitive habit. It will pull you right back into the same habits that got you there in the first place. Okay? You have to take deliberate action. You have to change something if you want a different result.

Okay? Action moves mountains. You won't fix overwhelm overnight, but putting these practices in place will make overwhelm, the exception and not the rule. Remember, you don't have to do it all to move forward. You just have to do what matters, do it well, and trust that next week you will rise and do it again.

You got this. That takes us to the end of today's show, guys, and if you enjoyed this episode, my gosh, like it's so fitting. It's funny, like I said, how sometimes these episodes just come into place because. There was no other episode this week. I could do guys. I was feeling the overwhelm and I'm like, shit, I gotta talk about this.

Like I have to talk about overwhelm. I have to talk about how we just allow it to happen because I know better and I still allow it to happen, right? It happens to all of us. So understand there are things that can make life easier. The move the needle lists is a big one. You will find a ton of value in it.

And once again, don't be afraid to exercise that powerful word. No. Also. If you need support. After hundreds of interviews with experts, leaders from around the world, one thing came back over and over again. Leadership is lonely. It's lonely at the top. It's lonely in a vacuum. It's lonely in business development, and we all can use a safe space to come to and chat about it and talk about these challenges together.

Guys that is the Catalyst Club. Okay. I know you guys are seeing the posts. There's lots of stuff coming up. We do events every single week. But what the Catalyst Club is built on, the values it is built on is helping each other. Okay? It's about providing a safe space, a private. Safe space for you to come in with peers, with leaders, with people just like you, and be able to talk about those challenges, be able to share them in a safe space where you can be encouraged and you can see that you are not alone and we are building just that.

If you want to be part of this, if you want to be part of a movement that changes the business community forever. I encourage you. Please come join us in the Catalyst Club. You can join at www.kellykennedyofficial.com and we will see you inside. I would like to shout out some incredible members of the Catalyst Club community.

Abe Dueck, Adam Kimmel, Alyssa McMasters, Amal Khoory, Andrew Brown, Breanna Kennedy, Carmen Leibel, Chris McArady, Chris Yeung, Colin Harms, Colin Christensen, Cyndi Crane,Danielle Forcade, Daveed Henriquez, David Fair, Eric Portillo, Jamie Stephens, Jan Hnat, Jemia Zagiel, Jesse Schewchuk, Kelly Reading, Kris Jones, Meaghan Ralston, Micah Dixon, Mindy Kay Broadbent, Nate Simpson,Patrick Kainz, Randy Lennon, Selva Nadar, Shelby Hobbs, Sherri Allen, Steven Langer, Tara Behrens, Tash Jefferies, Thoran Malitowski, Tina Green, Vijayan Swaminathan. Until next time, you've been listening to the Business Development Podcast. Thank you so much and we will catch you on the flip side.

Outro: This has been the Business Development Podcast with Kelly Kennedy. Kelly has 15 years in sales and business development experience within the Alberta oil and gas industry, and founded his own business development firm in 2020. His passion and his specialization is in customer relationship generation and business development.

The show is. Brought to you by Capital Business Development, your Business Development Specialists. For more, we invite you to the website @ www.capitalbd.ca. See you next time on the Business Development Podcast.